Pigs in Heaven

Pigs in Heaven

With retractable and liberating wings....

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Sometimes it's difficult being a person, being especially me.

When I actually speak nicely about how i feel about this certain issue... I'm deemed the 'blamer'. Having remarks like 'I had an argument with so and so because of this and now you, why can't you understand I do not have a choice' kind of sentences. I mean everyone has a choice. Your own life is run by you and solely you even though factors might change it but ultimately it is you who takes charge of the happenings in your life. It is you who chose the decisions that you make and the path you take to make your life more fulfilling.

Its ironical especially when I'm trying to accept things as it is and be nice and understanding... I'm being deemed as the 'blamer'... again by giving an attitude and being sarcastic, which in the first place I did not. (perhaps I should have)

So am I like trapped? or am I trapped! I'm like being handed the angel and devil role and having to play it at the same time. It's so tiring since being either nice or bitchy during such situations will gain me anything or solve anything.

Sigh.... I will definitely put an end to it if it happens again by being me, the usual me. Does not even matter if I regret it, which in any case if I am me I believe I will not regret, being true to myself.

posted by Oink @ 9/21/2006 04:26:00 PM

6 Comments:

At 8:02 PM, Anonymous said…

one morbid thought: what exactly makes you "you"?
At 12:23 PM, kittyn said…

the reason you experience it is because it's human nature to blame everyone and anyone else except oneself.... and others go through it at different times too.

anyway... you know best what to do if time comes :)
At 2:50 PM, Oink said…

Anonymous> Um.... I don't really think spending time finding myself is being morbid... I'm still alive and kicking and not dying anytime soon. :)

kitty> ya.. I guessed as much. definitely I will know what to do... sad to say unknowingly sometimes I do belong to this group of people too... but not often... and at least I realise it in time beofre any major damage gets done... :P
At 8:04 PM, Anonymous said…

the crux of the question is missed, or perhaps one may re-phrase it: what makes a person a person?
At 9:58 AM, Oink said…

anonymous> What makes animals animals? earth earth? galaxies galaxies? and God God?

Seriously, I admire your profundity in posing such a question which, I believe you have asked yourself that too... What makes you you? A homosapien. Unfortunately or perhaps fortunate in my perspective, I prefer to spend more time doing the things I love than be highly abstract and philosphical. :)
At 12:58 PM, Anonymous said…

please ignore one's idle banter then, peace.